As I was at the stoplight waiting for the sunshine to go from red to green, I was chilling, with my head bobbing towards the song “Wait” by Maroon 5. The lyrics go something like this,
“I'll make up for all those times
Your love, I don't wanna lose
I'm begging you
Wait, are you able to turn around?”
I was singing along to the song when suddenly, I felt my lips chapping. I ever-so-slyly reached out in my lip balm on the floor from the passenger seat, in one of my jacket's pockets. I opened the tube, when suddenly, the light turned green. Ugh!.
Thanks to my unsuccessful attempt at putting on lip balm and hearing Adam Levine's qualms about lost time with a past lover, I realized how true it is that. Time does not “wait” for you personally because it doesn't give a f*ck about you. Ironically, that is precisely why I love to wear watches. It jogs my memory that time is of the essence because time doesn't give a f*ck about you.
The concept of timing has been a big theme in my life within the last two years. Whether it was the good or the bad kind of timing, timing has me brought me all sorts of lessons.
For one, I came here towards the states on a student visa. After college, I was at liberty to work in the US for a year and then ultimately had to go back home after my work permit expired. I had a great job. I had been a Project Manager for a company.
A year passed, my visa expired, and I had to return home. Well, I chose not to. I believed out a way to stay — legally, which worked out in my favor in the end, but by law, I could not work for a year.
That one year did not do me worthwhile. My life was put on pause. Annually of my life slipped by just like that. I watched others pursue their dreams while my very own had to be paused, put on hold.
After that uphill battle of a year, which is at present, I finally won. I can work again.
Unfortunately for me, my new battle is the process of starting from the bottom once again. Because of time. Within that certain year, I was not able to progress myself career-wise. Because time doesn't wait.
After I sent countless resumés to companies, I discovered a decent company that called me back. I experienced both the first and second round of interviews and met using the HR manager and the director.
After which they told me they would give me 2 days to think over whether I wanted the job or not. In my head (as well as in any sane person's head), that meant employment offer, right? Wrong. Once i told them that I wanted the task, they told me that they would get in touch in a week to let me know their decision. They never did. What. The. F*ck. I had been told they would give me time to think if I wanted the job or not. And then, dead silence.
I also learned that people do not give a f*ck about your time.
Another example of bad timing that I have experienced is when people who have been in my entire life forever, come out of the woodwork out of the blue, blindsiding me and admitting in my experience out of nowhere that they had feelings for me personally this whole time.
Although it's flattering in a way, it ultimately caused more harm than anything since it just confused me and wound up hurting me. Too much time has transpired for me to be able to do anything remotely constructive about it. I learned that people do not comprehend the concept of time when it comes to love. Sometimes, it is only too late.
To answer Adam Levine's question, “If we are able to wait, if we can turn it around,” sometimes, the reply is no.
I can't wait and switch around the year of being able to operate on myself and furthering my career that I lost. But instead, I can start over and keep moving forward until I get to where I want to be.
I can't wait and switch around the wasted time with people who don't give a f*ck about my time. But instead, I can choose to not allow them to keep wasting it any further by letting go.
I can't wait and switch around to see what it could have been like with so-and-so. But instead, I can just thank them to have loved me.
What else can one do instead, you ask?
Well, for now, I can wait for the stoplight to turn into a green light before putting my lip balm on.
